Heaven Saw Me Today
As I prepared to teach Sunday school this week, I studied the story of Zacchaeus in Luke 19. Zacchaeus is described as being a short, rich publican. He was unlike by the people, but he had a deep desire to see Jesus. Because of the press of people, he was unable to see him, so Zacchaeus decided to run up ahead and climb a tree to get a better view. When Jesus passed by the tree, he looked up, called Zacchaeus by name, and invited him to come down and welcome the Savior into his home.
Luke 19:5-6
And when Jesus came to the place, he looked up, and saw him, and said unto him, Zacchæus, make haste, and come down; for to day I must abide at thy house.
And he made haste, and came down, and received him joyfully.
Jesus looked up and saw Zacchaeus. He knew his name. He invited Zacchaeus to come to him and allow Jesus into his life and his home.
Jesus sees me. He knows my name. And He invites me to see evidence of His love for me every day.
Today, I felt it. I sat in church with a wiggly baby and two toddlers who wanted nothing to do with me. It seemed everyone wanted Daddy, but he was sitting on the stand as part of the local church leadership. After Maddy begged me, I conceded and said she could quietly go sit on Daddy’s lap. But then Grace wanted to too, and even though I said she had to wait her turn, she ignored me and slowly walked away, glancing back at me to see the displeasure in my eyes at her disobedience. And then a higher up leader leaned over to Andrew and encouraged him to come sit with me and our kids in the congregation. “Go be a Dad,'“ he told him. So Andrew walked back, hand in hand with his little daughters, to the pew were I was sitting.
The tears almost immediately fell from my eyes. I hadn’t even realized I was feeling overwhelmed and in need of my husband, but a soft voice from heaven whispered to my mind, “I see you.”
Then I turned my attention to the speakers, and I cried again as I heard messages that seemed created just for me. One sister talked about our calling to minister to the children, something I am in the thick of as I traverse through endless days of making food for hungry kids, picking up toys, reading books and cuddling, wiping noses, redirecting misbehaviors, cleaning dirty dishes, and handing out hugs. Once again, I heard it: “I see you. You are a good mother.” Another speaker talked about how we can receive personal revelation. He talked about various things we can do to open the windows of heaven even wider and be more prepared to receive guidance directly from heaven. Again, I heard it: “I see you. I will help you navigate big decisions for you family that are coming up.”
Then an elderly sister behind me asked to hold baby Harper. As I glanced around the room to many friendly faces, I saw eyes filled with love and understanding. Even though I was worried about my kids being a distraction to others, I never saw a judgmental glance. All I saw was support, and in my mind I heard heaven testify, “I see you. I send you support and love through those around you.”
So, like Zacchaeus, many times I feel like I don’t measure up. I feel overwhelmed with the press of responsibilities and distractions that sometimes block my view of heaven’s love. But today, sitting in church, I felt it. I felt seen, and I knew that I was loved. And that knowledge makes me so joyful!
